Last Voyage for the Keeper of the Hubble

for John Grunsfeld

And as Atlantis opens up its door
to float him into space, and as he glides
in his bee-suit across the telescope’s sides
how will the stimulus seem to him—or,
as the shuttle opens up its bays,
will the housing market, or Iraq,
or Octomom be enough to bring him back?
What does genocide look like from space?
Here to fix a thing he can’t redo,
will the pebble below him leave him blinded?
Can the heavens make him single minded?
As he floats, I’ll be floating too,
me in my bee-suit wondering why
we’ve been built as we are but still can fly.

Thai Firefighter Dresses Up as Spiderman to Coax Eight-Year-Old Boy Off Window Ledge

Appeared in the Press-Citizen on March 27, 2009

Hero is a word I don’t use lightly.
He didn’t grab ahold of me but took
the arm of something from a comic book
while I climbed down the ladder, held on tightly,
and set him on the ground. I didn’t write
the story or mix the ink to burn like fire.
I perhaps did a fair impression of Tobey Maguire,
but I didn’t direct the movie, or delight
millions of kids, or even bring the ladder there.
I didn’t sew the suit or drive the truck
but simply hoped for a little bit of luck
as I put on the costume I was brought to wear.
Who should get the credit? Don’t ask me:
maybe the folks know better at A.I.G.

Laura Bush Unveils George W. Bush State China

Appeared in the Press-Citizen January 10, 2008

Some might wonder, in an economy this unstable,
about the First Lady’s departing wishes
to leave the White House with a set of dishes
that isn’t even microwavable.
Drapes, perhaps. Maybe knick-knacks or doodads
to decorate a shelf or windowsill,
but 320 plates for a cool half mil?
Some might react with surprise, oh-nos, egads,
and what-in-the-world-was-Laura-Bush-thinking?
But not me. I don’t want Sarkozy sitting there
mocking the presidential tupperware
or having to use a styrofoam cup for drinking.
Besides, the china isn’t all that bold:
the plates she chose are only rimmed with gold.







Update: Interestingly, the public appears to have some, er, appetite for the subject of Presidential China, if not for "good bad" poetry itself. Over the weekend, both the Tallahassee Democrat and the San Francisco Chronicle picked "Laura Bush Unveils George W. Bush State China" off of the wire and used it—one in print, one online.

More on Good Bad Poetry:

"Writing Good Bad Poetry"
"My Poetic License"
"At the Foxhead on Election Night"
"OMG! Buddhist Nun Texting Novel"
"Dinosaur Descendant to be Dad at 111"
"Cat Chasing Mouse Leads to 24 Hour Blackout"
"Man Faces Jail for Smuggling Iguanas in His Prosthetic Leg"
" 'Lingerie Mayor' Vows to Stay in Office"
"O.J. Simpson Questioned in Vegas Incident"

Chicago Politics

Appeared in the Press-Citizen on December 12

You say you like the North side best?
We’ll say we like the South.
Talk badly to the press of us?
We’ll slug you in the mouth.

Send our guy to the hospital?
Yours will show up dead.
Brag your books are in the black?
We’ll cook ’em till they’re red.

Hope to hold your convention here?
We guarantee you’ll fail.
And your guy goes to Washington?
Another goes to jail.